Recently, I have stopped updating to explain some irrelevant stories.

I'm sorry to say that, but it seems that there has been no update for nearly six days, right?

Think about it or explain it,

In fact, Baozi is still there. This book will continue to be written until it is finished. The reason for frequent interruptions recently is mainly because I have been working the night shift for more than a month. It was fine at the beginning, but recently I feel a little unwell.

Comfortable, but at the end of the day, my head feels groggy and I often have headaches.

I originally thought that my attitude was not very good, and I should at least keep updating it every day, but after coding for a while, I felt something was wrong, and I felt that I couldn't stand it (after all, my writing was not very good in the first place, and now I am not even in the state, so I whispered

bb), I think it’s better not to just write it and send it out.

So I stopped updating, and planned to switch back to the day shift and resume updating, probably tomorrow, so it’s time to continue the unfinished business.

By the way, I took a day off to adjust my status. I originally planned to resume updating today, but ended up going to bed after eating, sleeping after eating, and didn't wake up until dark.

But I still planned to write something later, but for some reason I suddenly wanted to write something other than novels.

It’s still a story,

The difference is that what I want to tell today is not the story of the protagonist and angels and demons, but the author's own story.

Well, I feel embarrassed to share my life experiences. It feels different from writing a novel. Maybe it’s because I feel ashamed.

But at night, people’s thoughts are most lively and it’s also the easiest time to get distracted, so I wrote it down with some trepidation.

To be honest, the writer is only 19 years old, doesn’t have much experience, and his life is not very difficult, but, well, it feels like he has many stories to tell.

Maybe this is the writer’s self-cultivation, hahahaha.

Let’s start from the beginning,

The writer was born into a wealthy family in the beginning. In fact, it is not considered wealthy, but it should be much better than the average family.

I heard from the old man that his family was running a factory at that time. In 2001, when computers were not yet popular, the family bought two computers.

In 2002, the year I was born, my family seemed to have bought a suite, and everything looked wonderful. However, judging from my previous tone, readers who have the patience to read it probably know that there will be some surprises later.

People have to learn to say no to three things, which are pornography, gambling and drugs. Under normal circumstances, we will say it righteously——

I am completely different from gambling and drug addiction.

And that year, my dad said yes to gambling.

Then the family collapsed and my father owed a lot of foreign debt. According to my grandmother, my mother cried every day and hid in her room in pain. She got divorced at one time, but she didn't divorce in the end.

Because of the children.

I was that child, I must have been 4 years old at that time. I didn’t remember anything at the time, I was ignorant, my eyes were wide open, and I didn’t know why everyone looked like the sky had fallen.

It can be considered a family scandal, but after repeated hesitation, I felt that there was nothing to write down. My father also changed his mind and together with my mother, we paid off all the debts we had committed more than ten years ago.

But these are digressions, let’s get back to the topic.

After my father got into debt, he went abroad to work and pay off the debt. When I was 4 years old, my mother and I went to my grandmother's house and lived in a small place in Tangxia, Wenzhou. It is said that my grandfather was angry with my father at that time.

He wouldn't let me stay at his house.

At that time, I was often spanked by my mother, hahaha, with a small white plastic belt that looked indescribable, and it made a crackling sound, which was really painful.

The reason is hard to explain. Maybe it’s because I was naughty when I was a child. I was the one crying outside. My mother locked herself in the door and cried. She cried even harder than I did. It’s like this every time. Give it to me.

Grandma sighed when she saw it.

Later, there was an exam. I don’t know why my mother was talking about it. She said that if I passed the exam, I would be granted a small wish. I studied very hard and got good grades. I took a pair of small scissors and asked my mother to use the scissors that she usually used to whip me.

He took out the small belt and cut it into small pieces, small pieces, small pieces in front of her.

After that, I cursed in a low voice as if venting my anger, and looked at my mother from time to time.

My mother couldn't laugh or cry at that time, and then she swept away all the debris silently. She also said she had no appetite for food that night, so she locked herself in the room.

I just remember that my mother beat me less often and became much gentler in her speech. So one time I deliberately crossed the road and was hit by a motorcycle, which caused a lot of nosebleeds.

At that time, my mother was washing vegetables on the slate of the stone rectangular water tank outside the door. She was scared to death, and the couple driving the motorcycle were also the same. They desperately drove me to the hospital. After a check, nothing happened.

Really, I just had a little nosebleed.

My mother breathed a sigh of relief, and then asked me angrily why I couldn't think about it. I said that she didn't scold me or hit me recently, and it felt like she didn't love me anymore.

He silenced my mother for a few seconds, then whipped me when she got home. That seemed to be the last time she beat me, in my memory.

Then when I was about 7 years old, my mother also went abroad to find my father.

Now that I think about the thoughts of children, it is really naive and strange. Some things seem to be lingering and deeply imprinted in my mind, as if they are as illusory as bubbles.

It passed away, but it makes me feel like it just happened yesterday.

Since then, I have been living in my grandma’s house and living with my grandma. That is the most unforgettable memory in my life, because at that time, I was the only one left in my life, and only my grandma.

For the next ten years, I never saw my parents again. Only a few words on the other end of the phone allowed me to get familiar with their voices.

But looking back now, the time spent with the old man at my grandma’s house was still the most heartwarming moment in my life. The old man’s kind face and the few green onions planted in small plastic pots by the door of the old house are also deeply engraved in my mind.

middle.

At that time, my grandpa, who was 1.9 meters tall, had not passed away. He married my grandma when he was 14 years old. He later participated in the Anti-Japanese War and there is a photo with many soldiers wearing military uniforms.

At that time, he had not yet suffered from cancer, and he could still hold the photos and point to me hesitantly to tell me which one was him.

But my grandma and grandpa have one thing in common, that is, they are both uneducated. In addition, the geographical location is no different from living in the countryside. As a result, my common sense of life is really poor, and my body is often dirty.

My aunt, my father's sister, felt that this was not enough, so she transferred to a private boarding school in Wenzhou when she was in elementary school.

In that private school, English was taught early, in the first grade. Since I transferred directly to the second grade, I missed the first full year of English courses, which directly paved the way for my subsequent poor performance.

.

I mentioned before that I was transferring to the second grade, so I was a transfer student. Because I had poor knowledge of life and was dirty, I was naturally excluded.

There were other excluded children at that time, and their situation was almost the same as mine. Their family conditions were not good, they were dirty, and they were shorter than me.

When there are some people in the class who make fun of you, school violence will be an abyss that no one can escape from today. Fortunately, I was mentally strong at the time and got through it.

I remember that at that time, I was short-sighted, and my eyes were blurry and I searched in the grass for a long time without finding it. In the end, I could only listen to the teacher's voice in class and couldn't see the blackboard clearly.

What made me most uncomfortable was that once someone took the student card I used to swipe my card at the canteen, tied it with white double-sided tape, stole it, and spent all the money in it.

Because at that time, the canteen still sold some hamburgers and Cokes for senior students, but now that I think about it, what I want to complain about is that junior students could also buy them in the past, and the student cards with all the information covered could also be used for consumption.

I can only say that I was unsociable. What can I say? I really didn’t know what to do at that time. I didn’t dare to resist, didn’t know how to refuse, and didn’t know how to say no to unfair things.

Later, my family asked me how my school was going, and they said it was very good. Every time I think about it now, I feel that I was so stupid when I was a child, hahaha, and I cried under the quilt in the dormitory in the middle of the night.

But what can I do, face life with a smile,

Relatives also said that I am a child like other children whose parents are not around. I am not sensible. I laugh crazily all day long and laugh happier than anyone else.

After that, my grades plummeted.

It was the same when I went to junior high school. It was still the same school. I tried hard to reform myself at that time. After I was promoted to junior high school, I got along well with my classmates at first. I even served as the dormitory leader. But I don’t know what happened later.

Some people say I have body odor,

Later, hehe, the bully in the class found that I was a very interesting person. I would not retaliate when I was scolded or hit. After that, I should smile, smile, and then the cycle started again.

At that time, I doubted whether this was my destiny. Now that I think about it, I realize that the way I handled things when I was young was wrong and there was a big problem.

Maybe it's because of cowardice. Maybe it's because he's afraid of her, but it's all in the past.

Now when I go to have a drink, I hear my aunt talking about my school uniform, and my cousin will say that I don’t know how to tell him. I laugh and say that I was not sensible when I was a child.

It’s funny to say,

When I was a child, the love I felt was all given by my aunts, aunts, uncles, and grandparents.

After all, my grades were very poor at that time, my grandmother was also in bad health, and my grandfather was in extremely poor health due to years of drinking.

It was my mother who came back to see me,

Ask me if I am willing,

Seeing her again, she felt a little strange. Her face was full of traces of time, just like my grandmother, who had been eroded by time and lost one leg and one arm due to a stroke.

I agreed,

Went to a foreign country, Italy.

It was the first time I met my father, whom I hadn’t seen for more than ten years. He was so unfamiliar to me.

Many people may have cognitive biases about foreign countries, but in fact, many people who went abroad at that time really did not live a very glorious life. There was almost no entertainment life, and they only had to make money.

Most of them work part-time. They go to overseas Chinatowns, where there are more Chinese than foreigners. They work there day and night. According to personal experience, life in China is much richer, but it is difficult to save money.

Since we only stayed in Chinatown, my parents didn’t speak Italian even after going there for nearly ten years.

When I first arrived in a foreign country, it was an unforgettable experience, because everyone of the same age in Chinatown was the same. They didn’t have such favorable family conditions, but it was easier to make friends with nice people.

Of course, there are also many arrogant Chinese who feel that they are different in a foreign country, which I personally don’t like very much.

At that time, I came out of the haze, and for the first time I heard from other people the words that I belong to someone else.

I can't forget that person standing at the door of the foreign language cram school, pointing at the child and saying to me: Get in touch with that classmate more. We are the same age. He studies hard and knows how to wash and cook. Unlike you who plays all day long.
To be continued...