From a long time ago, I have observed that I am different from others.

Because of the irischromia, the iris in the right eye are similar to the white color of the eye, and it looks roughly similar to the eyes of a dying person. You can even see hallucinations that sometimes occur in this pupil.

So I often have the idea that if I was born blind, it would be better to say that the latter might make me feel more relaxed than the former.

So since I became sensible, I have gradually begun to disgust, puzzled, and afraid eyes from the people around me.

So I had to escape something, seal myself up, and continue to be depressed and self-deprecating.

In school, I can't get close to others no matter what. I always deliberately keep a safe distance, pretending to be careless about anything, and always staying alone at any time.

Alas, it would be great if there were no corners in this world where no one existed.

As for me being diagnosed with depression, when did that happen?

Medication treatment, my father was strongly opposed, and he was always skeptical about drugs with side effects, so I had to accept his very long psychotherapy.

The doctor advised me to be hospitalized for guidance and treatment when I received sufficient rest and care.

But the face of the psychologist, which is reflected from my right eye pupil, always inadvertently reveals a disgusting expression that is no different from that of ordinary people. Although I say recognition, I can never get a sense of recognition from him.

The long mental therapy has not been effective, which is really a very painful thing for me. This means that I cannot get along well with others, adding a lot of burden to my relatives for no reason.

The high-intensity preparation for the third grade of high school was undoubtedly a worse problem for my condition. In the end, when most of the courses were finished in the ward, I barely passed the college entrance examination.

"How about going to Suzhou for a trip?"

After the college entrance examination, my father said to me.

Suzhou is where contemporary Chinese people yearn for another kind of life, which is definitely helpful in alleviating the pressure of the college entrance examination. But he was unable to accompany me because of busy official duties, but I had no complaints at all. It would be better to say that if he really wanted him to accompany me, I would probably feel even more uncomfortable because of self-blame.

So on the summer vacation of June when the college entrance examination ended, I came to Suzhou with my mother.

The purpose of being able to relieve the mental pressure brought by long-term exam preparation by visiting the ancient city of Gusu, thereby improving the condition is the purpose of this trip.

But unexpected things happened on the first day after coming to Suzhou.

I read a favorite book in an old bookstore, but I forgot the time as I read it. When I realized that I had already separated from the rest of the tour group.

And the mother who was supposed to be with her, she didn't know where to go at this moment. What's worse is that she couldn't remember how to contact her for a while.

Speaking of me who just graduated from high school with mobile phones, I don’t have that kind of thing yet, because I have to contact people with mobile phones. I think there is no one yet, but I think that if I go out, I should prepare one even if I am temporarily, and I feel a little regretful.

After asking the shop owner, he walked towards the destination where he thought he was the meeting place with hope that he could still catch up.

Turning into the narrow alleyway and stepping onto the road paved with bluestone slabs, the pink walls and black tiles extend to the front. Occasionally, you can pass by some magnificent brick-carved gatehouses. Plants that cannot be named can emerge from the walls of the homes of these former wealthy families, mixed with the fragrance of plants and the smell of history. Where is this?

There are street signs in the Hanging Bridge Lane next to the horse's head wall, but I still can't figure out the direction.

Because although it is a suspension bridge, which bridge is it? There are bridges everywhere here, maybe I am lost.

But strangely, the people around me who pillowed the river made me feel illusioned as being in my hometown, and I had such a wonderful feeling in a strange city, which made me more or less understand the meaning of my father's previous sentence.

The sky that had been gloomy before is now raining, and Gusu must be in the rainy season.

When I walked across a bridge, I saw some stores. One store said Tingyu Hall and some oil paper umbrellas were hung in front of the door. It must be an umbrella shop.

Standing in the rain is not a solution, so I had no choice but to bite the bullet and push open the wooden door. If possible, I hope I can borrow a phone number, otherwise I would buy an umbrella.

When the store saw me enter the door, he smiled and nodded at me. He sat on the wooden counter that looked like it had been a long time last year. Behind him was a picture of the prosperous Suzhou in wood carvings.

There was a person who seemed to be a customer who was standing in front of a screen and carefully looking at something. There was no one else except that. It seemed a bit rude to say this, but it seemed that this place was also a deserted shop.

Although there are Su Fan, wood carving, landscape painting and other handicrafts in the store, the empty spaces in the store are roughly used to place oil paper umbrellas with various art paintings. Only a red oil paper umbrella and other wood carvings that are not known are placed together on an ancient Duobao grid, which makes me a little strange.

This umbrella reminded me of myself who could not integrate into the crowd. I couldn't help but stare at the oil-paper umbrella and left the matter of borrowing a phone call behind.

"Do you like to mourn a paper umbrella?"

The shopkeeper slowly paced to me and said to me that he seemed very young, wearing loose linen shorts and round-frame glasses with brown lenses, but I couldn't understand what he had just said.

"A paper umbrella is called [Baofu Umbrella]. And these peach wood carvings are objects that ward off evil spirits."

Although I still didn't understand, I finally realized it. This is the so-called Wu Nong soft words.

Being suddenly talked like this made me a little nervous and my speech became vague. It became very difficult to explain when I was not a local. Although I tried my best to explain, I was worried because I missed the best opportunity and couldn't say it out.

"Brother, this guy seems to be aware of Wu Yu."

A man's voice came from the counter, as if he was the store's younger brother. Because it was a blind spot in sight, he had missed him. He sat on the chair in front of the desk, holding a coffee cup in one hand, wearing a white shirt that was incompatible with the things around him, and rolled his sleeves into the middle of his arms, combed his pencil that looked a bit ostentatious.

"Oh, that's right... I'm sorry."

The store owner hurriedly apologized to me.

"It's okay..." I was finally able to speak smoothly.

"Use this, I guess you want to borrow a phone call, right?"

The store’s younger brother raised a device that seemed to be used for communication and said that his mobile phone was a bit too big. Is there a mobile phone like this? This is the first time I have seen it.

How did he know that I was here to answer the phone? I noticed my puzzled expression and the store’s younger brother said with a smile.

"Natives generally don't come to tour groups in craft shops like ours, nor do they come alone like you. If you are travelers who come alone, it is even rarer to have lighter clothes."

He took a sip of coffee and continued.

"When my brother asked you just now, you touched your side. If someone from the store asked, you should subconsciously touch your wallet, and you should have a shoulder bag. It seems that you should have forgotten to bring a shoulder bag."

"You don't seem to have any place to put your phone when you dress like that. You should have forgotten your hotel with your shoulder bag and your wallet. To sum up, you should be a lost tourist-"

He suddenly stopped halfway through his words and looked at me carefully.

Maybe he discovered the white red film I deliberately covered with my bangs, so I hurriedly turned my face away.

"Oh, my brother always looks at some things that are not available all day long, and he will just break up with everyone and cannot eat them."

The store owner picked up his glasses and sighed.

"Hmph, my reasoning, my dear brother."

"I...I'm indeed here to borrow the phone..." I whispered.

"Hehe, look."

I took the phone number he handed over and called my mother.

"--mom."

Connected.

"Nan Nan? Where are you?"

The opposite sounds anxious.

"I should still be here... here on Pingjiang Road, I borrowed a phone call from a shop called Tingyutang."

"Pingjiang Road? You are waiting there, I will pick you up now."

"No, I can go back to the hotel by myself."

I was very sad about the rhythm of other people in the tour group, and I felt a little uncomfortable since the previous grade point. I was always in crowded places, which made me feel breathless. It would be better to be alone in a hotel.

"Don't talk nonsense, let mom pick you up."

"No, I don't want to cause trouble for the people in the tour group."

"What's wrong with this? They are anxious if they lose their people!"

"And I feel a little uncomfortable, I don't really want to see the attractions now."

A little willful.

"What should I do?"

"Let me go back to the hotel alone."

"I'm not relieved."

The store stood up.

"Then it's better, where is the hotel where U Du stays?"

I told him the name of the hotel.

"That's quite close. Walk west from Pingjiang Road. You will arrive through Guanqian Street. Far from Fu, A Xiao, then go from this little girl fish together. Just see if my father is sipping tea there and call him to come home for lunch earlier."

The shop patted his brother on the shoulder.

"Ah? Why? Didn't my father go to listen to Pingtan?"

"It's better to go to Guanqian Street Bai Xiangxiang. You can go to the store and eat coffee. If you don't ask you to go out and buy side dishes, you can do it in the room."

"I know, I know, I can go."

"Well, my brother will lead you, can you?"

The store owner picked up his glasses again.

"Why are you so embarrassed..."

"It's okay, I happened to go to Guanqian Street and get some coffee beans."

The store’s younger brother took out an umbrella from the counter.
To be continued...