Yu Fengcheng walked over a few steps, carried him into his arms, and trembled in his ear and said, "Xinyu, I'm sorry." The "I'm sorry" contained too many things. He apologized for Bai Xinyu more than one thing, but he could only say "I'm sorry".

Bai Xinyu closed his eyes. This was the first time he heard an apology from Yu Fengcheng, but this sentence could not comfort him at all, but instead made him feel endless sadness. What can I apologize? The problems between them cannot be solved by apology. Whoever they like and who they don’t like is unsolvable.

Yu Fengcheng said hoarsely: "Xinyu, I'm sorry for you... many things, I shouldn't say that your brother shouldn't have attacked you, I even... shouldn't have helped you to come to the Snow Leopard Team. This is not suitable for you, why do you want to save me... You shouldn't have suffered these..."

Bai Xinyu really wanted to tell Yu Fengcheng that if he was another comrade, he would have rushed out at that time. Although he had to endure pain and inconvenience every day, if he did it again, others might hesitate, but Yu Fengcheng would not. He used his shoulder injury to exchange for bullets that would hit Yu Fengcheng, which was worth it. The relationship was not there, and the friendship between his comrades was still there, and he would not regret it.

Moreover, some things really have to go through the test of life and death before they can figure out. If such a thing didn't happen, he would still be struggling with Yu Fengcheng. How long would it take? It would be good that he could finally make up his mind.

Bai Xinyu pushed Yu Fengcheng away, took out his cell phone and wanted to write something, but he didn't know what to write. What should he say? It turned out that he had nothing to say to Yu Fengcheng...

Yu Fengcheng held his hand, "Xinyu, you asked me if I like the deputy team. I have been thinking about this question. I didn't dare to think about it before and didn't want to think about it, so I said I don't know. I really don't know whether I like his admiration and attention to him. My eyes have been following him since I was a child, and I can no longer tell what kind of feelings it is. But there is one thing I am sure of, I never want to kiss him or hug him. I just want to do these things with you. I think, what I like is you."

Bai Xinyu's heart trembled, and his breathing suddenly became a little rapid. He didn't expect Yu Fengcheng to say this. Although his tone was full of uncertainty, the two of them had never confessed or promised for so long. Maybe they were embarrassed to speak, maybe they had never thought about the future, and more likely because he didn't know what Yu Fengcheng was thinking, so he didn't want to seem wishful thinking. He always hoped that Yu Fengcheng could give him a decent word, but now he could not feel happy when he heard this sentence. He believed that Yu Fengcheng had some feelings for him, but this feeling was never as deep as Huo Qiao's affection. Even Yu Fengcheng couldn't see clearly what he was thinking about Huo Qiao. How could he, an outsider, see clearly? For him, a person's heart is not entirely in himself. For what reason, and on whom, it is the same, and it is also unacceptable. He took a deep breath and typed it on his phone: I really don't care what you have to do with the deputy team. I'm going home, take care of you.

Yu Fengcheng's eyes turned red, "Xinyu, no one can replace you in my heart. The situation in the deputy team at that time was more dangerous than you, so I..." He also realized that this defense was too pale, and he couldn't continue to say it, but just held Bai Xinyu's hand tightly. He didn't want to let go of this hand. He let it go once, and there would be no second time.

Bai Xinyu's heart was so painful that he couldn't hold on.

Yu Fengcheng raised his face and stared in his deep eyes, "Xinyu, I know you blame me, but we won't end like this. Give me some time, I will go back to find you, and I won't let you down again."

Bai Xinyu shook his head, don't come to me, I don't want to toss and turn to sleep for who you are watching. I finally feel that I am a real man now, so don't make me weak and pretentious anymore.

Yu Fengcheng lowered his head and kissed Bai Xinyu's dry lips. Bai Xinyu's expression was very indifferent. He slowly pushed him away and turned around to go out. Yu Fengcheng couldn't help but hugged him from behind, and his body was trembling slightly.

Bai Xinyu took a deep breath, his nose was sore, and his eyes were blurred. After leaving, they would completely end. The past two years of military camp career was like a dream. He had experienced more than he had ever experienced in the previous half of his life. It would be better for him to grow in a short time. He was not in vain for this trip. He held back his tears, pulled Yu Fengcheng's hand away, and opened the door and left.

Yu Fengcheng leaned against the wall with his body weak, feeling his body suddenly empty.

The celebration meeting at noon that day also became Bai Xinyu's farewell banquet. The leaders of the military region flew over specially. Because of their outstanding completion of the task and the minimum range, Huo Qiao was awarded the second-class individual merit, and all the team members who participated in the action were awarded the third-class collective merit, and the sacrificed Lao Zhao and Jin Diao were chased as martyrs.

When Bai Xinyu bid farewell to the military medal, his heart was mixed. He knew that this would be the highest honor he had won in his life. The fact that he could stand here to receive the merit was exchanged for his blood and sweat from his comrades. He would never forget everything that happened on Kunlun Mountain in just two days. It completely changed his life. He witnessed the righteousness and courage that transcends life. Even if one day he was discharged from the army, the spirit of the soldier had been engraved into his bones forever.

The military merits did not make the soldiers smile at all. Huo Qiao touched his military merits, showed a tragic smile, and murmured: "What can I exchange my brother's life for..."

There was a low sob in the room, and the atmosphere was very sad for a moment.

Because many people's health has not recovered, they use tea instead of wine to see Bai Xinyu off. The relationship between life and intersecting each other does not require too much language. Bai Xinyu knows that he will never forget everyone in the Snow Leopard Team. But he didn't expect that tea can be intoxicating. In the end, many people still cried. Life and death are always a hurdle that people can't overcome. Bai Xinyu feels drunk too. If his experience in the Snow Leopard Team is really a dream, he suddenly doesn't want to wake up.

Chen Jing sat next to Bai Xinyu, touched his head with red eyes, "I can't be your squad leader in the future. After I go back, no matter what you do, I have to do it well, do you know."

Bai Xinyu's nose felt sore, he grabbed Chen Jing's hand, opened his mouth and called "Squad Leader" with his mouth.

Chen Jing's tears rolled in his eyes, wiped it off by himself, and he smiled, "You used to talk so much, but now you suddenly don't make a sound. I'm really not used to it. After you leave, I will be even less used to it. From the day you joined the army, I will be able to take you. You can't take you in the future, and you can't be lazy in places where I can't see it. You often write letters and call me."

Bai Xinyu nodded vigorously, pressed his head against Chen Jing's shoulder, and gently hit him twice, feeling reluctant. He met too many good people in the military camp, and Chen Jing was one of them. He helped him, spurred him and took care of him all the way, and his impact on him was immeasurable. This upright and responsible young squad leader was obviously one year younger than him, but he was like a big brother to stop him from going wrong paths and infected him with his character and principles. He could not describe his gratitude to Chen Jing. He was a comrade and senior who deserved his life respect.

Yan Shaozhen also came over, clinked teacups with Bai Xinyu, and said with a smile: "Xinyu, I'm not used to leaving the army since I started. I will call you often. My original plan was to be transferred back to Beijing next year, but now I plan to..." He lowered his voice, "Go back to accompany you."

Bai Xinyu smiled faintly. He felt that he would not have any thoughts and feelings in a short period of time. After separation, Yan Shaozhen's short confusion should have faded, so he did not take it to heart.

Yu Fengcheng kept looking at him silently from a distance, but he didn't get close. Almost everyone here knew the entanglement between them, but just pretended not to see it. The atmosphere of the celebration banquet was depression and sadness from beginning to end.

When the group broke up, Huo Qiao called Bai Xinyu into the office and handed him a thick document bag, "This is the material for you to change your relationship. After you recover from the injury, it is time to be able to retire. Whether you want to retire or enter the Beijing Military Region depends on your own decision."

Bai Xinyu nodded, but when he was in the end, he felt very emotional. When he first joined the army, he hoped to survive two years and retired from the army every day, but he really had the chance to retire, but he didn't want to leave.

Huo Qiao took out a cigarette and was about to lit it. He probably remembered the doctor's advice and put it down again. He looked at Bai Xinyu and said, "Xinyu, you are a soldier who surprised me and is reluctant to leave me. If you stay in the Snow Leopard Team, you will definitely have more development, but you are not suitable to stay here. If you don't talk about anything else, your relationship with Fengcheng will easily affect your judgment at critical moments."

Bai Xinyu's face was a little hot, and saying these words from Huo Qiao made him feel particularly embarrassed. Huo Qiao was also Yu Fengcheng's elder.

Huo Qiao smiled and said, "Your matter is not a secret anymore, don't be embarrassed."

Bai Xinyu had no choice but to nod.

"Chen Jing told me what happened after I was unconscious." Huo Qiao sighed, "Actually... I know a lot of things that you think I don't know. Fengcheng, a child, has been following me since childhood. I have stopped me. Our whole family has stopped me, but he is worthy of being a member of the Old Yu family. He is born with the word "stubborn". As a result, he really chased me here. When this child was a child, his parents were busy and he was very disobedient to discipline. He could make adults angry to death. I am the only one who restrained him. He admired me or was afraid. In short, when he was a child, he only listened to me. Unconsciously, he had to learn whatever I did. He had to get what I achieved. He always chased me, and he would inevitably have some feelings that were confused even by himself..."

Bai Xinyu was shocked, how could Huo Qiao be... But he thought again, Yu Fengcheng's attitude towards Huo Qiao was different from everyone else. It was not surprising that Huo Qiao was such a smart person, even if he saw nothing.

Huo Qiao smiled faintly and said, "Aren't you surprised? Fengcheng is homosexual, but I'm not in a hurry at all, because our family knows this. To be honest, sexual problems are nothing compared to other disasters he caused. He became much more honest after joining the army. In the past, he was just a little devil who could not afford to mess with in our family, so he listened only to me, so how could I not see it?"

Bai Xinyu became cramped. He didn't know what Huo Qiao wanted to say. Who knew that his nephew had a crush on him and was still so calm? Is there any normal family?

Huo Qiao looked at Bai Xinyu gently, "In the past, I thought Fengcheng's feelings for me were a troublesome thing. After I met you, I felt relieved. Before the child joined the army, there were many messy relationships, but in my opinion, he was only true to you. He had never liked others seriously and didn't know what he really liked, so he couldn't tell what he was thinking about me. With you, he would sooner or later see this. I really want to thank you."

Bai Xinyu's face turned pale and so shocked that he could hardly speak. He never expected that Huo Qiao would talk to him about his relationship with Yu Fengcheng. This awkward and embarrassing feeling made him want to disappear on the spot. He was in a mess and could not digest what Huo Qiao said for a while, and he was stunned.

Huo Qiao patted Bai Xinyu on the shoulder, "I'm just saying so much. You two still have to depend on luck. Fengcheng is quite stubborn. If you decide it correctly, you will never give up. I hope you will be calm and have a new perspective after a while. Finally, I wish you a good recovery as soon as possible."

Bai Xinyu was as if he had been amnesty, and he had already wanted to run away. He stood up and shook hands with Huo Qiao, but could not look directly into Huo Qiao's eyes.

Huo Qiao touched his head, "You are a qualified Republican soldier and an eternal honorary member of the Snow Leopard Team. If you want to come back and see you at any time, we are very welcome."

Bai Xinyu's eyes heated up, and finally raised his head, looked directly at Huo Qiao, and gave him a standard military salute with his left hand. No matter how his relationship with Yu Fengcheng changed, his respect for Huo Qiao had never changed.

In the evening, Huo Qiao sent a car to take their family to the airport, and all members of the Snow Leopard Team saw him off on the playground.

Bai Xinyu looked at the familiar faces and felt sad. His eyes swept over Huo Qiao, Chen Jing, Yan Shaozhen, and finally fell on Yu Fengcheng's face. The two of them looked at each other from afar, unable to tell how many unexplained emotions were hidden in their eyes. He was afraid that he would lose control, so he forced himself to get in the car. As soon as the car drove, his tears fell down. He didn't expect that he would leave the army so soon and leave Yu Fengcheng. A month ago, he was still a special forces soldier with high spirits. He was excited because he was separated from Yu Fengcheng and had enough private space. In a blink of an eye, they parted ways.

Jian Suiying hugged his shoulders and rubbed his hair, "Cry as much as you want to cry."

Bai Xinyu grabbed Jian Suiying's clothes and cried silently. He thanked Jian Suiying for sending him to the army, making him a better person here, and also allowing him to meet someone he liked. No matter what the ending is, he will never regret it.

After returning to Beijing, Bai Xinyu calmly recuperated, his throat gradually made a little noise, and his shoulders began to move. However, he always couldn't sleep well, and the big bed at home was thousands of times more comfortable than the camp bed of the army. However, he was not used to it. He could not see his familiar military camp and comrades. He felt indescribable emptiness and loneliness. He could not withdraw his identity. He always felt that he was still a special forces soldier.

Feng Dongyuan, Chen Jing and Yan Shaozhen called him. Although he could not speak, he felt very comforted when he listened to them. Squad leader Wu also wrote him a letter. Such a rough and hard person had a very correct handwriting, and the letter was full of heart-warming words of comfort. When he was storing the letter, he accidentally saw a large paper bag in his luggage. He suddenly remembered what it was and took out the things inside with his trembling fingers. It was a thick stack of photos, all of which were taken by the girl who had a good impression of him when they went to Korla to military training. They were whiter in the photos and smiled more carefree. He could not forget that Yu Fengcheng had eaten the jealousy of this girl and kissed him in front of her... Bai Xinyu's heart tightened suddenly, and the pain penetrated his body like an arrow.

He put the photos in a paper bag and dared not look at them anymore. In the more than a month since he returned home, the ice melted, the snow melted, and his injuries were mostly healed, but why did he seem to be still living in the army? His heart seemed to be imprisoned there, because Yu Fengcheng was there, so he could not be easily relieved.

Because his injury did not heal, he refused the invitation from all his friends. He did not leave the house every day, but he still woke up at 5:30 on time and went out to exercise for a while, maintaining the work and schedule of the troops. Even his parents almost stopped knowing him.

His brother came to him once and asked him what he had plans after he recovered from his injury. He said he wanted to go back to the army. In fact, he wanted to go back to the original regiment, at least there were Dongyuan and the others there, but he knew that his parents would not agree, so he settled in the second place. He wanted to enter the Beijing Military Region, but his brother didn't say it was OK or not, so he asked him to consider it again. He knew that his brother didn't want to send him back to the army, and it was impossible for him to complete the transfer procedures himself, so he had to drag it down. In fact, he didn't have any hope in his heart. Maybe his obsession would fade away with time.

One day two months after returning home, he received a call from the Snow Leopard Team. He thought it was Chen Jing or Yan Shaozhen, so he answered happily, wanting them to listen to their long-lost voice.

After the phone was connected, Yu Fengcheng's voice came from there, "Xinyu, it's me."

Bai Xinyu was stunned, and his hand holding the phone couldn't help but tighten.

"Have your injury been healed?" Yu Fengcheng knew that he could not speak, so he said to himself: "We have performed another mission in the past two months, and one of our comrades around us has been missing. In fact, I don't know when it will be my turn. Every time I think that I may die, I will miss you very much."

Bai Xinyu took a deep breath, and Yu Fengcheng's face appeared clearly in front of him. He always felt that Yu Fengcheng was very strong, so he avoided thinking that Yu Fengcheng would be injured and died. But the bullet was ruthless. Yu Fengcheng, like many people, could disappear in this world at any time. He suddenly felt deeply fearful and said hoarsely: "...who?"

Yu Fengcheng was stunned, "Xinyu? Can you speak?" Although the voice was hoarse and scary, I couldn't hear who made it.

Bai Xinyu said with difficulty: "Who... is leaving."

Yu Fengcheng said in a deep voice: "Don't ask."

Bai Xinyu was silent. Yes, he didn't know better, so let those comrades live in his memory.

"Xinyu, have you ever thought about me after you got home?"

Bai Xinyu paused, "No."

Yu Fengcheng's breathing was stagnant and could not speak for a long time.

Bai Xinyu paused word by word: "Stop contacting again." After that, he hung up the phone and felt heartbroken for a moment. Because he was kept at home all day long, his brother even hired a psychiatrist for him. The doctor said that this was post-traumatic stress syndrome, which is the so-called "post-war syndrome". In fact, he knew in his heart that this was only part of the reason. Sorry, he felt so uncomfortable, and because he broke up in love...

Four months later, his injury was completely healed, but his shoulders were not very flexible, his voice became low and a little hoarse. Although the injury was healed, it took a long time to repair the sequelae.

He no longer stayed at home, and began to meet some friends and drove around the surrounding cities. However, he no longer smoked and tried to drink as little as possible. He went home on time at 10 pm. He was not involved in the past life of living and living. His friends knew that he had changed now, so they gradually stopped making an appointment with him. He used to think that he had many friends in Beijing, but now he found that there were only two or three people who could stay with him, but he felt that it was very good that he could not be the original Bai Xinyu.

After a long time, he no longer insisted on returning to the army. After all, he did not have a military rank and would be discharged from the army in three to five years. His parents strongly opposed him returning to the army. He felt deeply that he had been marching alone on the Snow Leopard Team, which hurt his relatives a lot and was unwilling to worry about them anymore, so he was officially demobilized.

After the demobilization, he began to plan his future life. After thinking about it, he decided to go to his brother to work, while studying things and taking an on-the-job diploma. He sold his Porsche, remitted 300,000 yuan to Brother Zhao and Jin Diao's family, and began to anonymously support Feng Dongyuan's sister to go to school. He changed to a scooter of about 200,000 yuan. Sports cars, famous brands, and luxurious life, things that were important to him in the past, seem to be no longer important now. He only hopes that his time can be spent meaningfully, rather than squandering his youth like he used to.

With his experience in the Snow Leopard Team, it was no pain for him to read and study now. He picked up the book again and went to work and went to class.
Chapter completed!